November 1^st, 1944. Letter to Pyotr Molchanov:

Day before yesterday buried girlfriend-in-arms Sasha Koreneva. 2 more of our girlfriends were wounded: Lazarenko Valya and Shmeleva Zina. Maybe you remember them?

Zina Shmeleva spotting for Roza

November 3^rd, 1944. Letter to Pyotr Molchanov:

Returned from the front completely exhausted. This war will be remembered. 4 times the town passed from hand to hand. 3 times I got out from under the noses of the fascists. In truth, war on enemy territory is a serious matter.

November 5^th, 1944

Went a long time without writing, there was no time, was at the front. Went with the girls to Vovka. Chatted, that due to Captain Aseyev being killed, I look a little lost when I’m by myself. He was boozy and wouldn’t leave, although we had to, in order to be on time, so we insisted. I really like Nikolai Shevchenko, lieutenant in the artillery, brother of the pilot Shevchenko, who is a Hero of the Soviet Union. He is in love with me, but he’s not very tall, and I don’t like even a little shorter than me, and so I suffer for it.

Spent the night with Nikolai Fedorov. Good guy. He dotes on me: gets me anything I want (suit, hat, gifts). Only I don’t like him. Ah, my enigmatic nature. I take advantage of his gifts when I don’t love him. “An Enigmatic Nature” – Chekhov.¹

Celebration night [Great October Socialist Revolution day – November 7^th]. Invitations… made a schedule starting with the 5^th and ending… But alas, November 6-7 we work in the days and then collapse. Evening of the 6^th, katyusha² boys. Tankers arrived, Vovka Klokov. I wanted to go to [Nikolai] Borovik on the holiday, but work during the day. The katyusha boys are as good as the rest of the guys. Only Vovka Letison I love like a little brother, but he hinted at something I didn’t like. Flashed my dagger. I do not understand anything, even life, it’s all so intertwined.

November 7^th, 1944.

Spent the morning of the 7^th on the front. Spent the evening of the 6^th with Nikolai Fedorov, fun, but unexpected.³ A photographer came from Moscow. The generals called me, as a representative of the girls – a front-line sniper. But Nikolai did not want me to leave, and did not tell me that I was called. On the morning of the 7^th I met with the generals, and they scolded me for not coming. I said: “Not told.”

Home. Invitations, guys: “sugar,” and “sweetheart,” and hell. I decided not to go anywhere because I was dirty, tired. Out of the blue an invitation from Molchanov’s army. I could not refuse. Very good comrades, and thought that they maybe went somewhere else. Cough, but I went anyway. Arrived there, ill for two nights, and the 7^th laid in bed. So, the 7^th – half in Germany, half in Lithuania or the USSR.

I came home, got a bunch of letters, but none which pleased me. Worried about Nikolai. He disgusted me, and he acted very badly: wanted to get drunk on the 6^th and take advantage. I can’t stand it. Yashka wrote that he is fed up. He is stupid; I didn’t realize it them. I thought he was a good guy. I only occasionally respond to his letters, and he just wants a photo.